I’m sorry for the lack of posting since we came home from the hospital.
Mark’s sister and mother were here for a couple of days, and the kids and I had some catching up to do.
Evangeline is doing really well. She hasn’t had any fevers since we have been home. It is just amazing how well she is doing.
Eliza, on the other hand, has really been difficult to deal with and to understand. It seems like she has gone back to babyhood. She is extremely clingy with me. I cannot turn around in the kitchen without having to give another hug.
She has a sad look on her face all the time. She can’t zip her own sweatshirt. She seems to have unlearned everything I’ve taught her. She won’t use words. She cannot occupy herself for even one minute.
She scratches herself until she bleeds.
She constantly insists on sitting on my lap.
I am trying very hard to give as many hugs as she needs, but it almost feels like the more I give, the more she needs and the more unhappy she is.
She tells me she loves me every thirty seconds. She screams it loud and inappropriately in my face.
She hollers for me constantly, and when I answer, “Yes, Eliza. I’m here. What do you need?” She just puts her hands up to indicate she doesn’t know what she needs.
If I sit down, she stands in front of me facing me and falls on me.
Wherever I am or what ever I am doing, she stands beside me and bumps me or nudges me, sometimes so hard I almost lose my balance.
I know I was away again at the hospital with Evangeline, and I’m sure she missed me. I have tried very hard to pay a lot of attention to Eliza especially because of that very reason. I can rock her. I can take time each day to hold her, but I just can’t logistically do it all day long.
I’m just not sure what to think.