There has been much discussion throughout some of the groups I have chosen to share my blog in about my using the word, ‘rescue’ when I speak of adopting our daughters. I’ve read many comments from deeply pained older adoptees who feel hurt by the use of the word rescue. To those people, allow me to offer a genuine apology.
All of us long to feel wanted, chosen, loved. We want to feel that our parents selfishly wanted us, wanted to parent a child, wanted to have the privilege of parenting us.
I get it. And I’m sorry.
I can also say, without hesitation, that I wanted our girls. I chose them, consider having the privilege of parenting them an incredible honor, and am blessed beyond measure to call them my own.
Having said that, children need families. Orphanages are no place for a child to grow up. Even families adopting babies are protecting them from the horrors of orphanage life or the potential dangers of the foster care system, and they are offering those children the ability to have their most basic needs met, to attach, to have permanency and safety, to be loved.
If that’s not rescuing, I don’t know what is.
As a mother of eleven, I can attest to the fact that parenting any child is hard work, yet God’s word is clear. Children are blessings. All children are blessings, not merely those who are healthy.
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
the fruit of the womb a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
are the children of one’s youth.
Blessed is the man
who fills his quiver with them!
Psalm 127:3-5
I can also say that all children have special needs, not one child is perfect in every way. Every child is a mixture of strengths and weaknesses.
Indeed, we are all broken. And we all need the Savior. Their is no shame in needing to be rescued. God rescues us, and He certainly loves us. He loved us so much He sent His only Son to rescue us. We should never feel that we are loved less because we needed to be rescued. The Bible says he counts the hairs on our heads and collects our tears in bottle.
There is a big movement among conservative Christians to adopt children with big special needs. Even our girls had significant special needs. People are deliberately choosing to make their lives harder to care for these kids with big needs.
Why?
Because God loves them, and they are valuable treasures of the Most High God. He is love, and when we invite Him into our hearts and ask Him to fill us with Himself, His love overflows in us, and moves us to love His broken and beautiful children. His heart is for the orphan, the fatherless, the broken, the needy, and it is His faithfulness and love working in the hearts of His people that is bringing these precious children home.
For it is God who works in us both to will and to do of His good pleasure. ~ Philippians 2:13
Those of us who have answered God’s call to love one of His dear children, have done so by His grace, not in our own strength. So I was wrong in yesterday’s post to say that we had rescued our girls. I should have said that God had used us to rescue them, that He had moved in our hearts to long for them, and that we had stepped out in faith and watched Him bring them home to us.
And that we are now forever blessed.
Blessings!
I was born in Romania in 1977. If this needs any clarification, I was born in the dying days communism. Dying days of communism meant: starvation, FEAR, abandonment.
What I mean by abandonment is this: the dictator of Romania at the time, Nicolae Ceausescu demanded an increase in population, we Romanians still don`t know why. But what we do know is this: due to those demands, Romania`s population grew to a size which could not be naturally sustained. The result was a lot of abandoned children, children who grew up on the streets, drugged up, abused, children whose blood was tainted by the HIV virus spread by the indiscriminate use of the few syringes for the whole orphanages where they were originally abandoned. Well..Romania`s population at the time was..23 000 000. And this brings us finally to the reason for my posting. Boys and girls….China is a communist state, 1.3 billion +, AND with an eastern OBSESSION for male heirs sprinkled on top. Would you like to know what happens to girls with even a mild disability in that state? Hm?
Please read my post carefully and cherish the….salmon people, as I call them. Yes, the McCaslins. Souls who go against the current to do a very important thing with their lives. Whoever has understanding let them act upon it. The McCaslins can call it whatever they want, rescue…..saving,….adoption….love.
Oh and for you, who`s supposed to get hurt by the word rescue when you grow up…I say…chill out, you chose your parents very well 🙂
Thank you, Marius. Your comments bless me. I hope you are well. Loved seeing you dance in those costumes I made. 🙂
Xo
Marius I am glad you replied. I can not imagine life then. Diane, I am just sending you and your family love and prayers. You are a gift. At times you may not feel like it but you are one. I enjoy your writings, sometimes thru tears. A lot of times I can not imagine the craziness. (Good LOL that is for sure!) I see the smiles and the memories in just a small glimpse of your life.
Thank you, Rhonda. You’ve been such a faithful reader of my blog. The comments encourage me. A musician hears the applause immediately, as does a dance. But sometimes it feels like I’m writing for an empty auditorium. You’re comments always encourage me.
Xo
I stand with you ! In prayer , friendship, adoption and giving! We al must forget being so caught up in silly words and DO something!! Our world has an orphan crisis!! The kids are aging out and traffickers are waiting to grab them! Please let’s continue to support these innocent children!! Rescue them and provide them a life of real love and hope!
Orphans’ Cry International is based in this concept! Thank you, Diane!!!
When I read your posts, I see nothing but love and respect for your children!
Warm regards, Claudia x
Best explanation I have seen. I always see the controversary of rescue and wonder why – our kids future is grim in China, they literally are being rescued so they might be saved. I just have such a hard time understanding how this equates to their feeling less than, as well as us expecting them to be appreciative. Our kids were rescued, we feel blessed we could be Gods hands and feet, our kids have a future