The Silent Months

A NOTE TO THE READER: Below is a series of posts that will share the story of how I came to know and grew to love my daughters who were adopted at fourteen years old, mere days before they aged out of the adoption system. It does not reflect my feelings now. I choose to share my story to address a topic that is taboo in the adoption community. I share it to normalize the feelings that so many feel and yet are too ashamed to share. I share it to provide support to those who feel alone because there’s a big white elephant in the room, and no one can talk about it. I share it in support of adoption, in support of every single precious child waiting for a family, every one of which deserves to be loved and is lovable, every single one. Why can’t we talk about it? The feelings are real. The process of attachment can be easy and it can be painful, and the more we support parents who experience the painful side of adoption, the more we help the children. There are far too many disruptions, especially of older children, and if we as a community can come to see the feelings and the process as normal, perhaps we can provide support to those families and in doing so, help the children. Adoption is rooted in pain and loss, and often the process is painful. AND it’s okay.

A Prologue
God’s Heart and Workers For His Harvest Field

How Eliza is Doing Today
Eliza today

The preface
A Preface

Chapter 1
The Beginning

Chapter 2
Sharing A Friend’s Blog

Chapter 3
The End of the First Day

Chapter 4
China

Chapter 5
The Early Days

Chapter 6
the Day I Broke

Chapter 7
The Days After

Chapter 8
The Lettter

Chapter 9
A Break

Chapter 10
the Darkness.

Chapter 11
The Decision

Chapter 12
The Day I Let Her Go

Thoughts on Those Who Would Offer Criticism
An Aside

Chapter 13
Tears

A Few Words to Those Who Feel I’ve Been Too Open
Another Aside

Chapter 14
The Day We Brought Her Home

Chapter 15
A Deeper Love

Chapter 16
Not The End of The Story

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